What's the Situation?

Don’t you just love the summer?! All the cook-outs, day parties, and trips to the beach or city of your choice.  I can hear Future’s song playing now, “I just want to take you out and show you off; you already know that you the perfect one; girl when I’m with you, feel like a champion…I won me a trophy, I won, I won, I won a trophy.” (Yes, I can appreciate a Future song LOL). The time of year when all the women are dressed in the latest maxi-dress or the short, shorts with a cute tank looking sophisticated and sexy checking out the dudes as they walk by with swag for days and wonder,  He’s fine. What’s his situation?? 

Images courtesy of blendimages.com

Images courtesy of blendimages.com

Recently, I went to a cook-out, showing nothing but confidence in my cute tan leggings and long apricot color shirt to highlight the golden hue in my beautiful, brown skin. As I arrived, the host greeted me and introduced me to some of his friends -- married, single, young and old.  I flashed a pleasant smile, said my hellos and went to fix a plate.  With a plate full of ribs, pasta salad, string beans and baked beans in hand, a handsome man offered me a seat and pulled my chair out.  (Chivalry is alive and well!) I was thinking, what a gentleman.

He walked away and then came back with his plate and said, “Well, I guess I will sit down next to you Ms. Stephanie, if you don’t mind.”  I told him he could and as he sat, proceeded to strike up a conversation with me.  We talked about motorcycles, sports, and work.  All things that I enjoy.  Toward the end of the party, he asked if he could have my number.  I felt a little uneasy about this, but I just couldn’t pinpoint it.  Because of that, I asked him, why he wanted my number since he had only met me an hour ago.  He replied “because I like what I see and liked the conversation so I want to get to know you better.  Is that possible?”  So I thought, what the heck, it’s just a number, right?!

Three days passed and I received a call from the cook-out guy.  We chatted about the past weekend’s excitement and then he asked that notorious question, “Why is a fine woman like you single? I can’t believe no man has snatched you up yet.” I told him I’m just being patient, waiting for the right one.  I only want to be married once.  He asked if I had kids and  I told him I didn’t.  I asked him the same and he told me he had a 20-year old and a 13-year old.  I’m thinking, 13-year old huh? That uneasiness came back over me again.  Thinking…that’s a huge gap between his kids…I better ask him the question real fast because it sounds like he might be in a situation.  So I asked…are you married?  And he told me he was. 

DESTINY DECISION TIME! Do I ignore the fact that he is married and enjoy that motorcycle ride???

Images courtesy of blendimages.com

Images courtesy of blendimages.com


Some women wouldn’t care.  I was like that and I learned the hard way.  I would think, obviously his “situation” doesn’t have him in a good place right now, which is probably why he’s looking outside of his relationship. I would be naïve, and think I was the solution to the problem.  Wrong! I was selling myself short.  I didn’t think I deserved to have a man of my own. I was always taught “all men will cheat”.  Or, I would think that if I put it down better than his wife or girlfriend or support him where she was lacking, then he will leave her to be with me and not cheat on me.  Wrong again! But that is another blog; not this one!  God, said, “Stephanie, I can’t bless you with yours, if you are too busy lovin’ on someone else’s blessing”. Don’t let someone else’s blessing block your blessing.  That’s a tweet right there!

Remember, you deserve the best!  God has someone for you that will treat you with honor because you are God’s daughter.  See yourself as beautiful and worthy, despite your past.  It’s time for you to stop letting others dictate your worth and value.  Proverbs 31:10 GW… (Yes, I went there.) Some of you may know this verse: “Who can find a wife with a strong character.  She is worth far more than jewels.” If you don’t like rubies, then compare yourself to the precious stone that you love most and translate that to God saying “you are precious to me.”  You are made to be someone’s one and only forever…till death do you part.  Believe that and walk in that truth!  

So, the next time a man approach you asking for the digits, ask…What’s your situation?